Working almost 12 hours today almost makes me wish I could be a Stay at Home Mom (SAHM)... Almost. Then I remember why that's not an option, nor do I want it to be. I have my reasons:
1. My kids like stuff. By this, I mean they, like every other kid, like toys, video games, activities, McDonald's, etc. If I stayed at home, we would be eating Ramen Noodles and tuna nightly, and we would be cooped up in the house staring at each other in the dark due to a lack of cable and electricity. And if you know my kids, you know that they cannot survive without cable.
2. I'm lazy. I know if I were to stay at home, there would be a lot of expectations about keeping the house clean, cooking dinner, showering...I know myself well enough to realize that if left to my own devices, I would never step foot out of my pajamas, I would eat constantly, and the house would consist of little nesting piles. It would be a daily internal struggle to want to make Wesley happy by coming home to a clean house and cooked dinner versus sitting on my ass, gorging on pints of ice cream, and watching House marathons. Let's be honest, Hugh Laurie will win every time.
3. I need to feel important. As much as I enjoy motherhood, I need something that's totally unrelated that gives me a sense of accomplishment. Despite the fact that motherhood is far more important to me than my job, I happen to be very good at it. It's the first time in my career that I feel like I'm the perfect fit for my position. I receive consistent positive feedback from my co-workers and clients, and I receive a real sense of satisfaction from helping people. It's not without its frustrations, but for the most part, it's pretty conducive to motherhood.
4. I'm a procrastinator. There is so much pressure on kids these days with what they're expected to know by the time they enter Kindergarten that I know the Learning Center Sophie is in and the Child Development Program Vic attends are doing so much more with them than I ever could. Vic, at age 3, can write her name, count to 20 plus, knows her shapes and colors, and can draw basic people. Sophie speaks 4 languages and writes haikus. What? You can't prove she doesn't. When I was in school, I never did anything until the day before it was due. I don't think you can cram 4 years of learning into the day before Kindergarten starts. I prefer leaving teaching to the professionals, but that means a hefty childcare bill, which, in turn, means me working a full-time job.
5. My kids get on my nerves. Yes, even the most perfect children on Earth are loud and obnoxious, and I need a break from them, even the baby. I can't tell you how many Monday mornings I've breathed a sigh of relief walking into work. I pretty much know what's in store for me at work, and people are easy to work with for the most part. WIth the kids, however, I'm constantly on my toes. It's exhausting refereeing fights, entertaining the masses, and persuading them to do every little thing from going potty to cleaning their rooms.
The bottom line is that I choose to work because it makes me a better mom, and it benefits the kids. I get a much needed break from them, and they from me. That makes the weekends and holidays that much more special, and the time away makes me appreciate them more. Also, we have the funds to splurge on toys, eating out, and doing fun activities.
There are so many sites encouraging mom's to stay at home and work from home (Ha!). I wanted to let people know that not only is working outside the home a viable option, but it can also be a preferable one. There should be no guilt in being a full-time working mother. However, if I win the lottery tomorrow, all bets are off.