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Interims

09/25/2009 19:20

I remember when I was a kid.  Interim reports went out in the middle of each quarter to let parents know how their kids were doing, I guess so they had a chance to get on them to improve grades before report cards came out.  My mother had very high expectations, even for interims, and given that she was the Assistant Pricipal at my school, she knew when they were issued.   Interim reports were useless. They didn't go on the fabled "permanent record" that schools fool you into believing exists.  They were notices created only to get kids in trouble until report cards came out.  I know this from experience.  I was grounded once for getting an 89 on my interim in Algebra.  In grade school, an 89 is a B, one point away from a B+, mind you.  I was told that wasn't good enough. Why wasn't it an A, I was asked.  My response was that my sister got a D in Algebra, so my B, almost B+, was awesome compared to that.  "She's not a math brain, and you are," I was told. So, I was grounded until report cards came out. 

In the meantime, I was expected to do extra credit to bring that grade up.  This entailed going to the computer lab to practice Algebra equations before school.  Thinking I could outsmart her, I lied and said I went.  This proved to be to stupid, since she worked at my school, and could easily check behind me.  So, in the middle of the Pledge of Allegiance, my mother pulled me out of the class, and yelled at me in the hall for lying, loud enough that other kids told me they heard it.  I'm pretty sure that scarred me for life, and she's lucky I didn't turn into a serial killer.

Cut to 15 years later, and my 7-year-old is bringing home interim reports. He made a 96 in Language Arts, a 93 in Math, a 100 in Social Studies, and a 96 in Science.  That's right, all A's.  And, we barely had to push him.  So there, Mom. How do you like that?  With barely and pushing, my son was able to get straight A's on his interim.  And, he's the product of 2 slack ass procrastinators.  Turns out I am an overachiever in exactly one area of my life- having kids.  I give birth to geniuses.  Beautiful geniuses.  Hey, it's better than my mom could do.